Tuesday, May 15, 2007

I hope it is all in my head

Out of character

Please, I need advice. Someone I deeply love has recently done a 180 and I don't know what to do about it. At first I thought it was me. I have been working towards my authentic self and thought perhaps the changes I've made were being tested. Weird things keep popping up. When I share them with others whose opinions I trust, they agree that something out of the ordinary must be happening in this persons life. I am torn between: If it is something I needed to know I would have been told and what if I'm missing a scream for help. I've missed calls and been unable to call but did finally email asking what's up.

I fear sticking my nose in where it isn't wanted and fear ..... well ..... fear rejection ..... and perhaps denial ..... or that I will find out that it is all in my head.

If I have done something, I am completely unaware of what it could be. Once a long time ago one of my bestfriends stopped writing to me (I was in Guam and she was in Washington state), and not only did I not notice, I had no idea that I had said something that would upset her so much that she wouldn't correspond for two years (this was in the old days!). I would have liked to have been able to clear up what turned out to be a misunderstanding, sooner. Something similar happened with the person I am concerned about more than ten years ago and I just found out three or four years ago why.

Anyway, I digress .... I would like to hear how you might respond in a similar situation.


  1. I would directly ask. But that is me. Good luck!

  2. Ask directly, with love and concern, not with accusation or with an agenda. Good Luck!

  3. I would ask directly too, because to me, the wondering is worse than rejection.

  4. Yes, being direct is probably the best approach. Then, at least you tried to make it better.

  5. yup, a sing the chorus along w/ the others.

  6. Start it out by saying, "I love you, sister, and I need to talk to you..."

  7. I called even before any of your comments cause of course each and every one of you are absolutely correct. I am grateful for each of you.

    There was no answer. An email. No answer. Another call. No answer and no return call.

    There are other possibilities besides something to do with me and I hope I am just over reacting. I hope.


A pony for your thoughts.